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Happy Wife, Happy Life

I’m writing to men here. But if you are a woman who is married, dating or engaged, you’ll probably want to read this, too. Give him a gentle nudge to read it. Read more

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Why We Think We Shouldn’t Be Needy

by Benita A. Esposito, MA, Licensed Professional Counselor

“In insecure relationships, we disguise our vulnerabilities so our partner never really sees us.” ―Sue Johnson, Love Sense: The Revolutionary New Science of Romantic Relationships

 

Do you judge yourself for being needy? Well, I did for the longest time. Read more

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Attachment Styles: What predicts healthy romance?

We unconsciously act the way we do in romantic relationships for a good reason. Human beings have an innate drive to form emotional bonds with people who are precious to us. We suffer when we aren’t able to create secure bonds. The need for secure attachment is part of our inherited survival strategy. Read more

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Can My Marriage Be Saved?

 

That’s one of the first questions people ask me when they call about marriage counseling.

The answer is: It depends. Can you both answer ‘yes’ to these questions? Read more

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How to Choose a Marriage Counselor

Most people don’t realize that Couples Counseling is one of the most challenging specialties in our counseling industry. That’s why many therapists don’t offer it.

Let’s consider this analogy. If you developed a heart condition, you would begin with a visit to your primary care physician who is a generalist. But you would not receive all the help you need there. You would need to see a cardiologist who has years of advanced training in heart conditions. Read more

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Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work

Saturday April 18, 2015. 9:45am-noonCouple_beach_BenitaEsposito

A Workshop

Learn how to avoid “Disasters of Marriage.”

Based on Dr. Gottman’s 40 years of research with 3,000 couples.

  • Half of all divorces occur within 7 years.
  • Discover the  single biggest factor that predicts divorce at 16 years of marriage.
  • Four behaviors that predict divorce within 6 years of marriage with 94% accuracy.
  • Unhappy couples have a 35% increased chance of serious illness.
  • Trying to solve conflicts when you are stressed only makes things worse.

Become a “Master of Marriage.”

  1. Communicate, listen and empathize so you become each others best friend.
  2. Affair-proof your marriage by learning how to meet your spouse’s needs.
  3. Enhance emotional, physical, spiritual intimacy.

This workshop is based on 2 books: (1) New York Times Best Seller: The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman, PhD. (2) Biblical Reference Guide for The Gottman Method by Dave Penner, PhD. The Gottman Institute.

Time: Saturday April 18, 2015. 10:00am-noon. Please sign in by 9:45a.m.

Location: Good Shepherd Church. 495 Herbert Hills Drive, Hayesville, NC 28904

Who is Invited: Married, engaged, co-habitating, dating couples + singles who want to prepare themselves to create a healthy relationship.

Tuition: Love Offering

Registration: Complete the Contact Page by April 14. Or call 770.998.6642. Tell me how many will attend.  Please forward to your friends.

Want a Preview? Search YouTube for Dr. John Gottman and Dr. Julie Gottman “Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse – The Gottman Institute.”

BenitaEsposito 2013

Benita A. Esposito, MA, LPC

Facilitator: Benita A. Esposito, MA

Licensed Professional Counselor

Offices in Blairsville and Atlanta, Georgia

Specialties: Marriage counseling, couples counseling. Stress, anxiety, depression, trauma, PTSD. Holistic healing and psychotherapy for S.M.A.R.T. women and the men who love them. SMART = spiritual, mature, authentic, responsible, trustworthy.

To schedule a private individual or couples counseling session, or to inquire about intensive couples retreats or other workshops, complete the Contact Page.

Event Schedule – read the entire event schedule.

Contact: Benita A. Esposito, MA, LPC

Phone: 770.998.6642

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Dr. John Gottman’s Marriage Research Statistics

Couple happy brunetteDr. Gottman’s mathematical research on “masters” and “disasters” of marriage predicts divorce with 94% accuracy rate, based on 3,000 couples in longitudinal studies.

Statistics Read more

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Marriage Essentials: Appreciation and Affection

Do you know that expressing appreciation is one of the essential ingredients of a happy marriage? That’s right. According to Dr. John Gottman’s research, we must express at least five positive interactions to neutralize the impact of one negative interaction. In really happy marriages, couples express 20 positives to every one negative. The mostly destructive interactions contain criticism, defensiveness, contempt or stonewalling. When we express ourselves in this way without effective repair attempts, Gottman predicts divorce with 94% accuracy. Read more

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12 Agreements for Healthy Relationships

couple-holding-hands-black1.  Vulnerability + authenticity + empathy = safety and intimacy
2.  Tell the truth faster.
3.  Ask: What can I do to love my partner in more purity?
4.  Increase your ability to love yourself deeply.
5.  Find the innermost pain, be non-judgmental. Stay present. Breathe! Read more

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Marriage Story: From Cold War to Resurrection

“Our Journey Together With Benita A. Esposito”

 We started our journey with Benita just over eight months ago.  Our 15-year-old marriage was hanging on by a shredded string and I personally didn’t see any real good outcome from any attempt to try and repair it.  We were traveling in a tight circle of repetition and we couldn’t get out.  My husband and I were the absolute worst roommates on the planet.  And to add to the mix, we had two children who got to witness our madness. Read more

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