I’m writing to men here. But if you are a woman who is married, dating or engaged, you’ll probably want to read this, too. Give him a gentle nudge to read it.
Have you been wondering what to get your wife (or special lady) for Christmas that will create lasting happiness and not fizzle out after a week or two?
Have you tried to make your wife happy, but you feel like whatever you do, it’s not quite enough?
Have you wondered, “How can I encourage my wife to be more interested in intimacy?”
You probably know the phrase “Happy wife, happy life.”
Well, I’d like to help you figure out how to help your wife feel happier a lot more of the time. Wouldn’t that be fantastic?
First, let’s take a look at what you may have tried that doesn’t work to create lasting happiness.
You decide to buy her a special piece of jewelry. That is so thoughtful. She loves it, but the same old conflicts begin again after the holidays are over.
You get her a box of chocolates for Valentine’s Day. That tells her that you are thinking of her, right? Right. But the endorphin high from the feel-good chocolate is only temporary. Plus, she puts on a couple more pounds and she isn’t happy about that.
You give her a beautiful bouquet of flowers. That’s lovely. But after the flowers fade, it’s back to same ole’ same old.
Maybe you decide that it’s finally time to spend money on a cruise. That ought to work, right? Your heart’s in the right place. Now you are really letting her know that you love her.
But a few weeks after the vacation you discover that didn’t create lasting change either. Maybe she went back to distancing from you. Or maybe she’s still unhappy and critical. Or perhaps she prefers to spend time with her friends.
What on earth will it take to make her truly happy? You feel exasperated. You hate fighting because you know that it doesn’t help. Maybe you withdraw. But you haven’t given up.
Remember the movie, What Women Want, starring Mel Gibson and Helen Hunt? Mel Gibson plays the role of a high-powered advertising executive who doesn’t know how to cultivate healthy relationships with females …with his own daughter, his romantic partner, his co-workers or his female clients. Through a freak accident, he develops the ability to hear women’s thoughts and feelings. Finally, he can understand what women want, and what he is doing to offend them.
What women really want is for men to listen and understand them. They want you to be emotionally present with them.
That may be hard for you to do, especially when your wife is upset with you.
I get it. That is hard.
If you keep trying to show your love with gifts and being nice, but she doesn’t feel that you are genuinely connecting with her, she’s not likely to warm up to you in bed. Or any other time for that matter.
All the cruises, vacations, chocolates and jewelry can’t take the place of real emotional connection.
Happy wife, happy life. That’s what you want, right?
Don’t keep waiting, hoping time will heal. Time does nothing. Small unresolved conflicts snowball into mountains if they are not repaired.
I’ll help you get what you want. It can be a lot easier than you imagine … when you learn the right things to do to create lasting happiness in your marriage.
Here’s an easy way to get started. Click here to read anecdotes about couples I have counseled and other educational articles.
Give your wife a Christmas gift of the Valentine’s Retreat. Or schedule a one-day or two-day private couples retreat with me. Or sign-up for weekly couples counseling.
Dedicate this year of “Happy Wife, Happy Life.”
The Valentine’s Retreat is based on Dr. John Gottman’s 40 years of psychological research on what makes masters and disasters of marriage.
* You’ll learn the five most destructive behaviors that predict divorce with 93% accuracy.
* You’ll learn how to cultivate a vibrant relationship that lasts forever. No more temporary quick-fixes that end up wasting your time and money.
* You’ll walk away with a clear step-by-step process that you can use at home immediately.
–> Click here to read all about the Valentine’s Retreat.
I have practiced psychotherapy for 4 decades, helping individuals and couples in private sessions, groups and intensive retreats. I love the retreats best because so much transformation occurs in such a short time. I like results!
Click here to complete the Contact Form to schedule a complimentary 10-minute phone interview to see if this event is a good fit for you.
Private sessions are also available for individuals and couples.