Emotional Intimacy Begins Within: My First Retreat Experience

BE_Rhd_Back 2014-05-11 12.26.42 copyThe North Georgia Mountains cradled a group of 20 people who gathered for an Intensive Personal Growth weekend retreat. It was one of my first retreats and I felt uneasy. I was examining a lifetime of not being true to my self for fear that someone would not respect me. I realized that if I kept abandoning my self through my self-judgment that I could only expect more of the same from others. I was successful in business, and I looked good, but my body was stiff and hurt a lot. My breath was shallow. Deep down inside I was scared and insecure, but I hid it well.  My self-image certainly did not include crying in public places.

Committed to being true to myself, I decided to break out of the “I have to please others to be liked” mindset. Read more

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Your Authentic Self–Definition

I’m often asked, “What does it mean to be your Authentic Self?

Does it mean that you are happy all the time?  If you aren’t happy all the time, does that mean you have not arrived at being truly authentic? Does it mean that you are never afraid? No, not at all.

Here’s my definition of what it means to live as your Authentic Self.

1.    You are continually growing into the divine blueprint God designed for you. No two snowflakes are exactly alike, and neither are we. You use every situation to become more conscious on all levels: spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical. Read more

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12 Agreements for Healthy Relationships

1.  Vulnerability + authenticity + empathy = safety and intimacy
2.  Tell the truth faster.
3.  Ask: What can I do to love my partner in more purity?
4.  Increase your ability to love yourself deeply.
5.  Find the innermost pain, be non-judgmental. Stay present. Breathe! Read more

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Marriage Story: From Cold War to Resurrection


“Our Journey Together With Benita A. Esposito”

 In the following story, you’ll see how a distressed couple on the verge of divorce transformed their marriage in six months. The story is told by the wife. If you want to skip the details, scroll to the end to read about the breakthroughs and what worked in therapy.

The Wife’s Side of the Story

We started our journey with Benita just over eight months ago. Our 15-year-old marriage was hanging on by a shredded string.  Read more

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Anxiety Disorder Definitions

beautiful womanAnxiety can be a healthy response to stress management, and can help people cope according to researchers at the National Institute of Mental Health. When anxious fearful feelings interrupt daily actives and become excessive and unwarranted, anxiety becomes a problem. Anxiety disorders can take several forms, from fears of social interactions to obsession and panic attacks. Read more

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Marriage Counseling Story. Healing the Physical Heart and Emotional Heart.

square04Research published by the American Medical Association indicates that 90% of all disease is stress-related. Our mind, body, emotions, spirit and relationships intricately affect each other. When we heal the emotional or spiritual root of dis-ease, pain can ease up. Sometimes other physical symptoms vanish completely. I’ll show you what I mean in the following story. Emily’s heart condition and her emotional pain healed when her husband joined her in counseling. Psychotherapy can accelerate healing, and is used as an adjunct to medicine. Read more

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Excavating Your Authentic Self, Creating Your Dreams.

What do you want to create?  What has God planted in your heart?  A job that feeds your spirit and calms your body?  Time to relax and heal? Relationships in which you feel cherished? Health? Life-work balance? A home that you call your sanctuary?

If you want your external reality to change, you have to change your internal reality. Read more

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12 Keys to Conflict Management

My first mentor told me, “Conflict is a necessary part of intimacy.”

I didn’t want to hear that. I hated conflict, but his words rang true. I knew I wasn’t good at conflict management, and because of that, many of my relationships did not thrive. That was 30 years ago and since then, I have spent zillions of hours learning how to handle conflict productively. Read more

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Death’s Gift. Healing Grief Article

With a breast cancer prognosis of one month to live, Mrs. Samuel and her family came for counseling upon the recommendation of her doctor. No one in her family talked about her dying, and that was fine with her. I wanted to help them create emotional intimacy before she died and thereby make her passage easier. Read more

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Healing Grief: Helping Others. Laura’s Story

Do you remember the last time you were with someone who was in a great deal of emotional pain? Perhaps it was a teenager experiencing a first broken heart, or a child upset about having to change schools, or an adult grieving the death of a pet. How about the last time you were hurting? Did you allow yourself to really feel the pain? Did anyone support you? Read more

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